Another poor soul on the diet treadmill!
This Weight Loss Buddy is : Offline
This Buddy last logged in at 13-06-2007
Birthday: Hidden or not set up
This is my story
My story? Where to start, where to start!!
I was a chubbie baby, but as I grew older, I got skinnier. My mom used to refer to me as her little escapee from Belson! My brother and I were bodies on sticks, while my sister was a plump baby - and remained plump as a young child. My brother and I obviously took after the slim side of the family.
I eventually got married and had two beautiful children, a girl and a boy. With my first pregnancy I put on loads of weight - and lost most of it after my daughter's birth. With my son, I didn't put on much weight at all - but what I did put on, stayed there! However, this didn't pose a problem - I was still around the 9 stone mark. However, I was quick to notice that my metabolism seemed to change after that second pregnancy and I had to watch what I ate.
I still managed to hit my 40th birthday weighing 9 st. 4 and in a size 12 dress. And that was me for about 4 or 5 years. Since that period, it has been a constant nightmare as my weight has yo-yo-ed up and down - but mostly UP!! My daughter got married in 1999 and I got myself into a size 12 dress and size 14 little jacket on top (it was a very fitted jacket,and while the 12 fitted very well, I chose the bigger size to make it more comfortable to wear most of the day) and I felt very good. I managed to keep my weight around the 12/14 sizes, with the occasional drift into a 16. When that happened, I WENT MENTAL! And pulled out all the stops to get back to at least that size 14!
Three years ago I needed radical surgery for breast cancer, with immediate reconstruction. However, the reconstruction process has meant several more surgeries with various waiting times while the last surgery 'settles'... and even now I'm waiting for the next phase. I just seem to pick up my energey levels from the first surgery, in time to go through the next - and bang! I am back to no energy, and nothing to do but take it easy, no extreme exercise - and nibble. My surgeon has told me he'd like me to lose weight before doing the next surgery, otherwise putting more weight on will only make a mess of what he plans to do... Therefore, here I am, back on the diet trail!!
I've NEVER been a sweetie fiend (though I do like wine gums! But I don't often eat them though as I know that they will just add more weight). I'm not one for piles of cakes and biscuits and I more often than not pass by the chips, take aways and pizza's. Weeks can go by when I don't touch chocolate in any form and I very seldom 'binge'. I can't remember a time when I had REAL BUTTER instead of slimming spread and I always choose diet drinks... So why am I large??? IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!
I have a Husky that I HAVE TO take for walks (nope! None of your 'meandering' stuff!) and so I'm not a COMPLETE couch potato! We're hoping to breed her in the next couple of weeks in order to get another puppy. So, 'exercise' is definitely in the plans for the forseeable future!
For the last 10 years, I have been conscious of every morsel of food I put in my mouth. For 10 years I have been very conscious of what that fat lady in the mirror looks like in most clothes.
But for the last 5 or 6 years, the size and shape of my body has offended me to the point where I can barely stand to look at myself. I DREAM of ways to get rid of all this weight! If I qualified for stomach stapling, I WOULD DO IT IN A HEARTBEAT! I've had so much surgery now, general anaesthetic doesn't worry me like it did and so - I would do whatever it took, to be able to look at myself in a mirror and feel human again!
But... isn't it sad that we have to be shadows of ourselves to feel 'human'??? *Ouch!*
